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Thread: This is for Mystic Mo or Anyone w/ Suggs...

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Oct 2006

    Default This is for Mystic Mo or Anyone w/ Suggs...

    Wow, where do you find those good poems???? I've searched & searched & can't find any as good as yours. If you can or if you have any, I need some to send to my penpal....he is very depressed....(seems so in the letter I recieved from him 2 days ago) I need some poems of cheer or encouragement... Thanks!!!!

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Gloucestershire UK


    I'v eposted so much you could go back through and collect a whole bunch of funnies but for the time being here's a few to make your pal smile - I may already have posted these but maybe you missed them [smile]

    There are recent rumors that Julie Andrews did a Senior Citizens concert. Ms. Andrews sang a song from the Sound of Music, 'Favorite Things'. There were a few changes to the words, so here's the new song.

    Wondrous Things

    Maalox and nose drops and needles for knitting,
    Walkers and handrails and new dental fittings,
    Bundles of magazines tied up in string,
    These are a few of my favorite things.

    Cadillacs and cataracts and hearing aids and glasses,
    Polident and Fixodent and false teeth in glasses,
    Pacemakers, golf carts and porches with swings,
    These are a few of my favorite things.

    When the pipes leak,
    When the bones creak,
    When the knees go bad,
    I simply remember my favorite things,
    And then I don't feel so bad.

    Hot tea and crumpets, and corn pads for bunions,
    No spicy hot food or food cooked with onions,
    Bathrobes and heat pads and hot meals they bring,
    These are a few of my favorite things.

    Back pains, confused brains, and no fear of sinnin,
    Thin bones and fractures and hair that is thinin,
    And we won't mention our short shrunken frames,
    When we remember our favorite things.

    When the joints ache, when the hips break,
    When the eyes grow dim,
    Then I remember the great life I've had,
    And then I don't feel so bad.

    Author Unknown

    For all the girls!

    When I was in my younger days,
    I weighed a few pounds less,
    I needn't hold my tummy in
    To wear a belted dress.
    But now that I am older,
    I've set my body free;
    There's comfort of elastic
    Where once my waist would be.
    Inventor of those high-heeled shoes
    My feet have not forgiven;
    I have to wear a nine now,
    But used to wear a seven.
    And how about those pantyhose-
    They're sized by weight, you see,
    So how come when I put them on
    The crotch is at my knees?
    I need to wear these glasses
    As the prints were getting smaller;
    And it wasn't very long ago
    I know that I was taller.
    Though my hair has turned to grey
    And my skin no longer fits,
    On the inside, I'm the same old me,
    Just the outside's changed a bit.

    Author Unknown

    It Could Be Verse

    Last night I held a lovely hand,
    A hand so small and neat,
    I thought my heart would burst with joy,
    So wildly did it beat.
    No other hand unto my heart
    Could greater pleasure bring
    Than the dear one that I held last night--
    Four aces and a king.

    Author Unknown

    Bedtime Prayer

    Now I lay me down to sleep,
    I pray for a man who's not a creep.
    One who's handsome, smart and strong.
    Who's not afraid to admit when he is wrong
    One who thinks before he speaks.
    When he promises to call, he doesn't wait six weeks.
    I pray that he is gainfully employed,
    Won't lose his cool when he's annoyed.
    Pulls out my chair and opens my door,
    Massages my back and begs to do more.
    Oh send me a man who will make love to my mind.
    Know what to say when I ask "How fat is my behind?"
    One who'll make love till my body's a' itchin'
    He brings ME a sandwich too, when he goes to the kitchen.
    I pray that this man will love me to no end,
    And never compare me to my best friend.
    Thank you in advance and now I'll just wait,
    For I know you will send him before it's too late.


    Author Unknown

    The Scotsman

    Well, a Scotsman clad in kilt left a bar one evening fair,
    And one could tell by how he walked that he'd drunk more than his share.
    He fumbled 'round until he could no longer keep his feet,
    And he stumbled off into the grass to sleep beside the street.

    About that time two young and lovely girls just happend by,
    One says to the other with a twinkle in her eye:
    "See yon sleeping Scotsman, so strong and handsome built?
    I wonder if it's true what they don't wear beneath the kilt!"

    They crept up on that sleeping Scotsman quiet as could be;
    Lifted up his kilt about an inch so they could see.
    And there, behold, for them to view beneath his Scottish skirt,
    Was nothin' more than God had graced him with upon his birth.

    They marvelled for a moment, then one said: "We must be gone.
    Let's leave a present for our friend before we move along."
    As a gift they left a blue silk ribbon tied into a bow,
    Around the bonnie star the Scotsman's kilt did lift and show.

    Now the Scotsman woke to nature's call, and stumbled towards the trees.
    Behind the bush he lifts his kilt, and gawks at what he sees.
    And in a startled voice he says, to what's before his eyes,
    "Oh, lad I don't know where ye been, but I see ye won first prize!"

    Author Unknown

    They say NOBODY is perfect so just call me NOBODY

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