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Thread: Inmate Relationship

  1. #91
    Join Date
    Nov 2017

    Default Re: Inmate Relationship

    Quote Originally Posted by Moonlampje View Post
    this wasn't even an opinion anymore, this is a hateful message. But hey, just stating my opinion here. So what's the difference with him stating his opinion?
    That's a semantic game. You're still advocating murder for a person's view point. The difference is that I disagree with your view, although I'm not suggesting you should be killed for it.

  2. #92
    Join Date
    Jan 2018
    Germany, Bonn

    Default Re: Inmate Relationship

    Could be that a few things a getting mixed up in here...

    For one, there's the question of whether his statement was only a harsh way of stating an opinion or a provocation or sth. more like hate-spitting.
    As to how it is interpreted, well, that depends on the reader.
    For me, it was more like: "Huh? My goodness, that guy must really be frustrated if he isn't a troll and really believes in what he's saying." And then the reaction I posted above. I didn't feel angry or thought of being provoked.
    But i can also imagine people feeling rather hurt or angry by that way of talking. For those who might have had abusive guys in their private life this might just be another one, just by the way RAC 51 expresses himself here.
    It could well be interpreted as "arrogance" and "mockery". Sexism he mentioned himself.

    And I don't know how it feels to those having a relationship with an inmate.
    To me it's just a guy trying to pass on his own pain to others.
    But for former inmates or people being in a relationship with an inmate? Hm, I can just guess...

    And for others RAC 51 just might express an opinion. Maybe he does. Conservartism isn't illegal.
    But the way he did it just appears (to me) as a will to be "right" as a will to provoke, as a will to "show it to them all." And sorry, I'm not jumping into that one.

    But I can imagine throwing such a phrase off out of anger as well, if I would be angry enough and would not take my time to count to 3187. (10 certainly would not be enough).
    People feeling hurt or angry or both sometimes don't watch their tongue.
    So, what now?
    RAC51 being angry at "the feminists" and (possibly) about a broken marriage threw it out here, Moonlampje got angry too (out of hurt for missing empathy and generalization, I suppose) and now you're interpreting her as wanting him to be killed.
    Where shall that lead? Escalation, defendance, justification? Really?
    It sometimes is hard for me to walk my talk and use language in a way I want to use it and in a way that goes along with the values I hold dear.
    This happens mostly when sth./s.o that is really important to me is being laughed at or not appreciated.
    Might be that this happened here as well?

  3. #93
    Join Date
    Sep 2017
    United States
    PDS's: In Love

    Default Re: Inmate Relationship

    I came in at the end of this conversation. Looks to me like some took comments personally, while others just didn't seem to care.

    The way I see it is that we ALL have feelings and we ALL have opinions. We ALL want to be able to express these things freely, feel validated, and not be judged by others. See my experiences in life gave me different reasons for my beliefs. NO ONE else has experienced life EXACTLY as anyone else has experienced their own... PERIOD... END OF DISCUSSION! YOU cannot have beliefs EXACTLY like I have because YOU have not experienced life EXACTLY as I have. So, instead of getting mad at someone for what they believe, maybe we should be trying to figure out Why it is that they believe this way. We might find a little more tolerance for each other. In other words, "can't we just get along???" If we can't get along, then I think we should walk a mile their shoes before we judge others. That way we're a mile away from them, and we have their shoes! Bwahahaha.

    On another note, some of you are going to get upset over what I'm about to say. That's fine, that's your prerogative and I respect that, and I'm always open minded enough to listen to other people's perspective. Okay, so, the way I see it, is that there is a double standard for men and women. As far as my perspective as a woman goes, I believe that men and women are NOT equal. When a man can give birth to a baby from inside his own body...well you know the rest. However, some women want and proclaim their right for equal pay, equal advancement, equal this or equal that, they don't want to accept EVERYTHING equally. For example women are not sentenced to the same length in prison for committing the same crimes men do. I never hear those same women asking to be treated equally in those instances. This breeds resentment and animosity. These women need to understand they have to accept the good, with the bad, and the ugly. In other words, you can't have a baby without a man contributing his sperm, or changing some crappy diapers, ya dig? We are not designed the same way, we don't think or feel the same way either. So how in the world can we be equal??? We're just not!! We were designed to compliment each other, to work as a team. So, I would personally appreciate it if feminists would stop fighting for ALL men and women to have equal rights because I like my rights as they are now!

  4. #94
    Join Date
    Jan 2018
    Germany, Bonn

    Default Re: Inmate Relationship

    Hi PDS,
    the interesting goes for the word "equal". Now, that's a language thing and with not being a native speaker I hope I can express what I mean.

    In English you have the word "equal". In German we have the word "gleich".
    Yet, while in English "equal" is just used the way you described, "gleich" can be used in two different ways and meanings.

    "gleich" can be used like in "equal before the law" or "equal payment".
    "gleich" can also be used as "being the same".
    As for sentences: A man killing someone as murder will get 15 years as well as a woman doing the same here. I did not here of women getting less time than men. Unlike the pay gap which is in Germany up to 22% less money for the same work.
    When I wrote "equal" in my posts above, I meant it in the sense of equal worth.
    I don't mean "equal" in the sense of "homogeneous" and "not be individual".
    Just to clear that up in case it may have caused any misunderstandings.

  5. #95
    Join Date
    Oct 2017

    Default Re: Inmate Relationship

    I'm sorry you've had bad experiences, RAC51, but painting an entire gender with a single brush (especially one that espouses that all women are devious, grasping, social climbers who have no interest in actual relationships beyond what it can get them) is not only wrong, it's offensive.

  6. #96

    Default Re: Inmate Relationship

    It's well documented that women are generally sentenced to harsher prison terms than men for the same or similar crimes. They are punished by a patriacle system for being offernders AND for being women offenders. And I'm not a feminist.
    Married 11 years, still waiting.

    To ask well, to answer rightly,
    Are the marks of a wise man:
    Men must speak of men's deeds,
    What happens may not be hidden.
    ~ The Havamal

  7. #97
    Join Date
    Mar 2015
    Sporadium's: Snobbish

    Default Re: Inmate Relationship

    Quote Originally Posted by sunray's wench View Post
    It's well documented that women are generally sentenced to harsher prison terms than men for the same or similar crimes. They are punished by a patriacle system for being offernders AND for being women offenders. And I'm not a feminist.
    If this is accurate, I wonder how it breaks down across different crimes. For example, I would guess women guilty of child abuse or child neglect would be most likely to get harsher punishments than men because it may likely be seen as more of an affront than if a man did it as an essentialized characteristic of "woman" is that of mother and having maternal tendencies. In this sense, it would be like the reverse of the parental custody laws that typically favour women for the same reasons.
    This is all me guessing of course.
    It would be interesting to see the sentences given to men and women across different crimes.

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