A hillbilly walks into a home improvement store and says "Give me a chain saw that can
cut down ten trees in an hour. So the guy gives him a chain saw. The next day the
hillbilly comes back and says "You lied, it only cut down one scrawny baby tree in an
hour!" The man behind the desk comes up, grabs the chain saw, gets it's motor running and just then the hillbilly said "Hey! what's that noise?"

710 Cap

The other day I was in the local auto part store. A lady comes in and asks for a seven ten cap. We all looked at each other and said, "What's a seven ten cap?"
She said, "You know, it's right on the engine. Mine got lost some how and I need a new one." "What kind of a car is it on," they asked? Now I'm thinking maybe an old Datsun Seven Ten, but no, she said it's a Buick. "OK lady, how big is it?" She makes a circle with her hands about 3 1/2 inches in diameter. "What does it do?" we asked. She said, "I don't know, but its always been there." One of us gave her a note pad and asked her if she could draw a picture of it. So she makes a circle about 3 1/2 inches in diameter and in the center she writes 710. The guys behind the counter are looking at it upside down as she writes it...and they fall down behind the counter they are laughing so hard.
One guy said, " I think you want an oil cap." She said, "Seven Ten cap, oil cap, I don't care what you call it, I just need one, and I don't see what is so damn funny about it."
Yes, she was a blonde.

Note: If you read "710" upside down.... it spells OIL!!!!

MOODS OF A WOMAN

An angel of truth and a dream of fiction,
A woman is a bundle of contradiction.
She's afraid of a wasp, will scream at a mouse,
But will tackle her boyfriend alone in the house.
Sour as vinegar, sweet as a rose,
She'll kiss you one minute, then turn up her nose.
She'll win you in rage, enchant you in silk,
She'll be stronger than brandy, milder than milk.
At times she'll be vengeful, merry and sad,
She'll hate you like poison and love you like mad.


MOODS OF A MAN

Horny
Sleepy
Hungry

No peoples feelings were hurt in the making of these jokes LOL

nice ones Mo!

karin-belgium

hey wat do u call a blonde found dead in a closet? 1999 world champion of hide and seek lol