 Random Thoughts
Random Thoughts
A friend of mine confused her Valium with her birth control pills. She has 14 kids, but she doesn't really care.
I know what Victoria's Secret is. The secret is that nobody older than 30 can fit into their stuff.
I gave up jogging for my health when my thighs kept rubbing together and setting my pantyhose on fire.
One of life's mysteries is how a two-pound box of candy can make a woman gain five pounds.
The best way to forget all your troubles is to wear tight shoes.
Amazing! You hang something in your closet for a while, and it shrinks two sizes!
Reason to smile: Every seven minutes of every day, someone in an aerobics class pulls a hamstring.
I read this article that said the typical symptoms of stress are eating too much, impulse buying and driving too fast. Are they kidding? That is my idea of a perfect day!
The trouble with some women is that they get all excited about nothing (and then they marry him...)
The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight, because by then, your body and your fat are really good friends.
Insanity is my only means of relaxation.
Sometimes I think I understand everything, then I regain consciousness.
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