Hello everyone..i need some advice.i have been writing a p/p for over a year now.things got a bit serious and we were talking love and marriage.i could not go over to visit him because of personal circumstances. but i agreed i would look into it this year sometime.. since then some stuff has gone wrong in my life. and allthough i care deeply for this man. i dont want to carry on leading him on saying i might be still coming over to visit him. and i dont want to break his heart by telling him i am not. i do think he wants more then to be just penfriends, and i just dont know what to do??? any advice would be most wellcome.. thank's

Im not you so i cant give the right answer but my advice would be to be honest with him. He will most likely respect it even if it does hurt, at least you were real enough to tell him the truth Just my two cents Hugs Missy

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Life throws curve balls, get battin and stay strong! Momof6

Hi casa22,
I'm sorry to hear that things have not gone well, in your life. But, things like this happen.
I can understand your reluctance to tell your PP about your change in feelings, but somehow, you have to find the courage to tell him. I won't be easy, but in the long run, you will be doing him, and yourself, a favor. There is no getting around it.
Fortunately, it is rare that someone dies of a broken heart.
Good luck and be well.

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Live simply, love generously, care deeply, speak kindly.

Cowards are cruel, but the brave love mercy.

Hi Casa,

I think you just have to be honest - as you say, you don't want to lead your pp on. Tell him the truth Casa, I really do think that it's for the best.

I agree...honesty is the best policy. The kinder the better though in matters of the heart.

thank you everyone for your replies. it's not that i no longer care of for him. it is because i cant come back to the states,i wont go into the reason on here not yet anyhow. and he allready knows all this i have never kept this from him.i have told him when he gets out he is quite wellcome to come here. he has never said no..we have been very close. and have talked love. and we have been a rock for each other.and i am sure he must be wanting someone to visit him. i told him lets just stay friends and you look for a lady in the usa.. but he wont have it.he wants us. to be an item. but like i say because of something that happened i cant come over to the states yet and it is breaking my heart...other then not returning his letters i dont know what to do..i cant sleep through the stress!! of it...i dont want too hurt him.

Hello Casa,

Can I e-mail you? Or would you like to e-mail me? Are you in the UK Casa.

honesty is always best. if you are not honest up front with him it will only hurt twice as much in the end for the both of you.