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General Prison Talk Any and all topics related to prison, incarceration, etc.

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  #1 (permalink)  
Old 08-23-2003, 03:12 AM
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Default Do you have a favorite pen-pal?

Most of you know I'm writing to nine inmates, but I've found myself looking forward to some of their letters more than others. I like all of them, but some seem more genuine and less mechanical in their writing than others. Some seem more needy, and I guess this fills a need of mine to contribute something to their lives. One guy has not been totally honest with me about his crimes, but I'm hoping he will level with me eventually. The one I like the most has the worst handwriting, and probably the least education of all that I write - but I find myself wondering and worrying about him the most. Do you have a favorite pen-pal?
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Old 08-23-2003, 03:19 AM
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yes, that would be my Bundy. I would do anything for him. I have sent books, money, gotten him magazine subscriptions, written letters to people for him, whatever he wants, I would do it. He hates when I send money though. But if I don't, then he can't write as much, lol.

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Old 08-23-2003, 03:38 AM
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Yes out of my our I have the best rapport with a very special one. He writes all the time from his heart and is so inquisitive over such silly things even things we find humdrum like what is a day of work exactly like for me. It breaks my heart because he was incarcerated at such a young age and has so much more time to go... but he is my favorite.
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Old 08-23-2003, 04:27 AM
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Susan, you do such a fabulous job, many hearts to you. So many people work wonders here, it is so great to read the special things that go on with friends.
Just keep up the good work everyone.
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Old 08-23-2003, 06:43 AM
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bigdog,
I agree with you, it fills some kind of need in me too. Just like being a nurse and taking care of people fills a need in me. Do you think maybe it's an act of selfishness on my part for being a pen-pal to an inmate? I wonder.
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Old 08-23-2003, 11:15 AM
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Lydia, I wouldn't call it selfishness, but I doubt I would be writing these guys if I wasn't getting something out of it myself. If the writing had stayed mechanical like it first appeared to be - I probably would have stopped. I guess there are a lot of reasons, on both sides of the bars, why people write. I believe human contact is important, and a motivator to continue.
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Old 08-23-2003, 11:24 AM
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The weird thing-of all my pen pals, the one I started with liking the most-has been dishonest and is trying I believe to play me. The one that I had the most doubt about-has turned into the best one...it was that a trust had to be built..and I misread that as being dishonest...
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Old 08-23-2003, 12:03 PM
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I believe that we connect with some, and some is a casual thing. Myself, i have one that is my very best friend and I would not trade him for the world. He is not only my buddy, but my best friend as well.

I have others that i am very close too as well.
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Old 08-23-2003, 01:50 PM
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Starknock, that is so sweet, thank you. I think Ken is right, he wrote someonewhere that it's a good idea to "adopt" a prisoner, just look out for there welfare and send a few dollars every now and again to ease there discomfort. It would be nice if everyone did that. Imagine all the love and good will that would come out of that.
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Old 08-23-2003, 02:28 PM
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Libbie brings up the point of how young some inmates were when they began their sentences. I write to one guy who is now 41 and has been in prison for 25 years, since he was 16. While we hear of some prisons with TVs and movie nights and organized sports and canteens, his is not at all like any of those. There is no dining hall, meals are served in the cell. There is no canteen, though all of his basic toiletries are provided. You shower alone. There is no gym, so you do exercises in your cell. You are allowed to walk in a small enclosed courtyard for 30 minutes each day, also alone. There are no classes. There are no jobs. You are allowed to check out one book per month from the library cart that goes around to the cells. He reads each book 4 or 5 times and has almost memorized some! (The librarian is nice though and sometimes "forgets" that he has already had his book for the month and lets him have a second.)

He is allowed one 30-minute visit per month and 2 15-minute phone calls, but those are reserved for his mother, who has stayed with him through all of these years.

My correspondence with him is the only other outlet he has to a world he will never know nor see again. His mother writes but only talks about family stuff and his old neighborhood, which he likes. But with me, he hears about his favorite sports teams and players who weren't even born when he went inside. I do 4 or 5 page summaries of movies or tv shows or news events. I also send him clippings from magazines and newspapers but they only allow one inserted clipping per letter. He likes magazine photos of the latest cars and gadgets and sports stars.

This would have to be my favorite inmate penpal. He is my buddy and will be till one of us dies.
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