Friendship and Advice Wanted Please.

I don't think you have to pay for phone calls unless they call collect. On his other behavior be open and honest and direct. Let him know your expectations so there isn't any confusion.

You might have a bit of a problem if you have only written one letter and he is declaring love. Look at it from a realistic point of view. I wouldn't give out your phone number this soon. I didn't think that phone calls were allowed if they weren't collect? Anyway, both of these things are major red flags. Proceed with caution.

Nettie, I hate to sound so negative but, I will: things like that are usually BS. There are inmates out there who see these letters from kind souls on wap as invitations to a game and this does sound like one, to me. The phone number asking so soon is one thing but combined with a love declaration- nope.

If you want to continue with this person I would write a very boundary explaining short letter of why you are here in the first place. If you don't hear from them again, you've got your answer. There is a chance, I'll say it just for the benefit of the doubt, that he might come to his senses at that point and end up being a good pal. You seem like a nice person who would give that same benefit of the doubt but tread carefully here, smells like cow droppings to me.

Nettie, I know my rep on WAP isn't very good right now... but I would stand with Mountanddo and Gooddog on this one and err on the side of caution with this guy. As My Stepdad explained as he had been in prison before he met my mom... Letters are like gold to inmates... some, all it could take is one and instantly they're in love which is what it sounds like this guy is....

It took 3 months AFTER I pawned K off on a friend of mine (at the time) that it dawned on him that all I needed was a close friend. He then started letting My Brother (his Celly) read his letters back to me to make sure he wasn't going overboard. Then, M (Brother) got out, then K admitted again that he had fallen for me... By then, I was ready to admit the same. Heck, for the first 6 months, if K wanted to talk to me, he had to ASK M to make the call because neither M nor I would give the number out.

Anyways to make a long story short, didn't intend to make this about me, but just sharing my early experience with K. But I would send him a very short and sweet letter letting him know what your intentions are and where you stand and like gooddog said, if they don't answer back... then you know his intentions weren't on the up and up.

(Sorry Mount and Gooddog... wasn't trying to reiterate what y'all were saying but it ended up that way (shrinks) )

...and I'm not saying that it is impossible for him to have genuine feelings that he identifies as love because you took the time to write but yeah... most people wait a while before they come with that, if they're coming at all.

That's very true, gooddog... couldn't have said it better myself... lol

Hi Guys,

Thank you all so much for the information. This guy has written again and is frightening the britches off me lol. I will write him a short, factual pointed letter today and hopefully, he will accept me as a friend instead of a potential wife. I hope he continues to write because the letters have both been full of despair, and I can sense his loneliness. Love ya's Nette

Nette- you may be dealing with something akin to a mental illness. I know, great armchair diagnosis there but if on letter 3 he's thinking "wife"... yeah... serious problem. Compassion for that problem but still, you have to be careful what you mix your world with, know what I mean?

If you're here to listen to despair and lonliness you can do that all day in prison writing and truly there is nothing wrong with putting yourself out there for that, just be careful. Sometimes there are really poor boundaries and difficult interactions within that. Been there.

Thank you babes, I am always known for getting myself into tight situations lol. I will take it very slow, and will heed your advice. I have only replied to one of his letters now and not by return of post, in an effort to slow him down too. Appreciate your concern and advice hunnie. Nette