Nicole Bradley's Profile Age: 35
Location: Corona, CA
Total Blog Entries: 3

INCARCERATION IS LONELY

It hurts to get close to people in here because it seems that every time you get close to someone they disappear from your life. I am so lonely for friendships. People come in and out of here all the time yet I’m the one left behind since I’m the lifer. It’s hard to know who to trust. I reach out to others with the hopes that someone would care about me and I usually get hurt. Or, when I do form a close bond with someone in here, they go home. I don’t hear from them again. I wish that I could be home right now. Each day without my loved ones, another piece of me is torn from my heart. I feel so very lost and alone. Each day is a struggle for me. Will the Parole Board let me go home? Will I be home while my dad is still alive? Will my 2 nieces and 1 nephew ever get to know me? Will I ever be out there with my mom, sister, brother and everyone that I love? I’m so scared that I will be forgotten by others. I might have made mistakes in my life but I’m still human. I pay for the consequences daily for all my mistakes but I’m still someone deserving of love, forgiveness, second chances and understanding. I’m fighting for my freedom here but I feel so very drained by the sadness and loneliness I feel.

Nicole Bradley's Profile Age: 35
Location: Corona, CA
Total Blog Entries: 3

GETTING READY FOR THE PAROLE BOARD

I made a really big decision by signing a waiver to wave my parole hearing for 3 years. I want the Board to see that when I finally go to my parole hearing it’s because I am ready for parole. I need to get my own paid psyche evaluation and work on my parole plans. I really need everyone’s help. First, if there is anyone that is willing to send me books on self esteem, co-dependency, anger management, substance abuse and anything else that can help me deal with my emotions, I would appreciate it so much. You can order paper back books through www.amazon.com. I also need help with raising money for a psyche evaluation. Any funds can be sent directly to me at www.jpay.com. Since I owe restitution I will only receive 45% of the funds sent to me. I could really use help with being able to buy stamps or food at canteen but the main reason I need the funds is for the psyche report. I’m interested in finding sponsors to help me with my relapse prevention and anyone willing to help me on my journey towards my transition into society. I just want to better myself so that I can make the right choices in life and so I won’t make the same mistakes again. I miss my family so much and need to be home with them. If you can offer social support, or just friendship, it would mean a lot to me. Thank you, Nicole Bradley.

Nicole Bradley's Profile Age: 35
Location: Corona, CA
Total Blog Entries: 3

INTENSE LONELINESS

I feel such an intense loneliness in this place. I need people in my life that won't give up on me. I'm getting tired of people writing and forgetting about me. If you're not serious about getting to know me then don't write at all. I can't afford to be wasting stamps I don't have on others that don't write back. Anyone can donate $ to me at www.jpay.com. Also, I talk about Facebook a lot because I have a prayer and support group. I need supportive people on there, not jealous people. I wish there was someone that can do internet searches and print things for me. Also, I collect pictures on postcards of nature, cities, and sunsets. I feel so out of touch in this place. Is there anyone in Southern California that can visit me on a regular basis, and let me call them collect? I don't get regular visits. My family visits a few times a year. My brother, sister, nieces and nephew rarely write. I can't even call them collect. I miss them so much. Can anyone order me some books? I like books from www.wizards.com and www.dungeonsanddragons.com. I just need something to do to pass the time away because when I'm bored I think a lot. Then I think depressing things, like wondering if I'll ever go home or if my family will forget about me. Someone please write me nice long letters. I need some mail please! xoxo